The Almost-Dictionary
The almost-unabridged Almost-Dictionary
Version: 0.987654321 (almost-one)
Almost-Words:
Almost-adult: Someone old enough to think adult thoughts, but not old enough to be trusted to almost-always think adult thoughts.
Almost-art: An object that possesses almost-enough artistic qualities to be called art.
Almost-aspect: An almost-aspect is an almost-coherent and almost-complete description of some almost-thing. There is almost-always more than one side to an almost-aspect. There is almost-always yet another almost-aspect to discover. Almost-aspects overlap with aspects (to a large degree). Almost-aspects have edges, just like aspects have edges. The edges are sometimes the most interesting parts, especially if they too have almost-aspects.
Almost-athletic: The state of being not quite athletic.
Almost-attended: Someone that you expected to attend your meeting or party did not attend. (Perhaps they had a flat tire, or became ill, or had a more urgent engagement.)
Almost-babies: Abortees; or grown men that cry like the dickens when she says she's not going to abort.
Almost-beautiful: Not quite beautiful.
Almost-bilked: Almost-everything you got for Xmas you either didn't want or already had.
Almost-Champagne: Sparkling wine from somewhere else (like California).
Almost-colorless: A light pastel color.
Almost-compatible: Not quite compatible.
Almost-creep: Almost-words, almost-stuff, and everything related to Almost-World that will steadily pervade other worlds. (Incidentally, there is no stopping almost-creep once it gets started.)
Almost-dictionary: A collection of almost-words arranged in alphabetical order, with almost-meanings associated.
Almost-different: An egalitarian fantasy or nightmare, depending on which aspect one considers.
Almost-dispassionate: Somewhere between passionate and dispassionate. (This would be a great name for a perfume.)
Almost-documented: When a product or service is documented to the extent that all legal requirements are met, but not to the extent that you can easily find what you need to know.
Almost-electable: Not quite electable (and that could be for one of several reasons that we don’t need to get into here).
Almost-employee: Almost-employees (contractors, part-time help) are usually the almost-perfect solution for the typical business.
Almost-engaged: People go through the early stages of a relationship rather quickly, and then go through a protracted period of almost-engagement before finally getting engaged.
Almost-everyone: Over fifty percent but under a hundred percent of a population.
Almost-example: An example that almost nobody understands.
Almost-faith: Faith or belief in something unproven only to the extent that one's life is almost-unimpacted by that faith or belief.
Almost-finished: Something not quite done or finished. (E.g. Schubert's Almost-finished Symphony.)
Almost-forgot: Someone forgets something until the last minute, and then remembers. The delay in remembering may or may not be noticed by someone else; but if it is, that is almost-always almost-embarrassing for the party of the first part.
Almost-fun: Something is detracting from the fun.
Almost-garbage: One person's garbage is another person's almost-garbage.
Almost-happy: Something is detracting from the happiness.
Almost-hurricane: A tropical storm.
Almost-inconceivable: Strangeness that is not quite inconceivable.
Almost-inhuman: Lacking in some amount of pity, quite savage, or fairly nonconformist.
Almost-innocent: Not guilty enough to go to jail.
Almost-island: A peninsula. A grounding reef that is just below the surface of the water.
Almost-jungle: Woods, forest, a large treed backyard.
Almost-junk: See almost-garbage.
Almost-keep: If someone only lends something to you then you can only ever almost-keep it.
Almost-lecture: Almost-formal instructions given in an informal setting.
Almost-listening: Ah, . . . What?
Almost-mother: A stepmother. An aunt. A nanny. A babysitter known really well by the family. A significantly more mature sister.
Almost-mug: A mug with an almost-saying on it (that might be for sale now at www.Almost-World.com).
Almost-need: Want.
Almost-news: A message that does not sufficiently inform.
Almost-office: An inadequate office.
Almost-old: Middle-aged.
Almost-penitent: Regretful to the extent that one has been caught.
Almost-penult: Almost the next to last in a series.
Almost-perfect: High quality.
Almost-pissed: Just barely angry.
Almost-polluted: Someplace not polluted enough.
Almost-poverty: Still able to afford sales tax and lottery ticket purchases.
Almost-prepared: I ah, well, I think what this means is that one could have thought about it more.
Almost-quality: Lacking excellence, inadequacy, or deficiency.
Almost-refined: You can dress them up, but you can't take them out.
Almost-reliable: Likely to let you down at just the wrong time.
Almost-retired: Still working at a sinecure; or, more likely, slaving away at part-time wages.
Almost-shirt: A shirt with an almost-saying on it (that might be for sale now at www.Almost-World.com).
Almost-synonym: A near-synonym, or cognate.
Almost-travel: The next best thing to being there.
Almost-universe: An out-of-this-world place where Almost-Worlds thrive.
Almost-vertical: Leaning.
Almost-war: Any serious dispute other than an all-out war.
Almost-words: Words that are found in and that are appropriate in a semantic almost-space, an almost-world, and an almost-context.
"Almost-Worlds": The "Almost-Worlds" theory of the Universe was first proposed by Max Buzzell, of Almost-University, Almostville, FL. It is akin to Hugh Everett's "Many-Worlds" theory except that each world is not quite complete: Each of the worlds in the Almost-World's multiverse are an Almost-World unto themselves, . . . almost; hence, the name of the theory.
Almost-Xmas: Any celebration held on December 25th that is not totally to your liking.
Almost-yes: Maybe.
Almost-zirconia: An less-expensive alternative to cubic-zirconia (that synthetic gemstone of zirconia resembling a diamond).
